Thursday, March 25, 2004
Osama to MSNBC: THANK YOU!I, Osama, and the entire Al Queda membership want to thank MSNBC for their comments at 1030PM tonight Thursday, March 25, 2004.
During a news headline break after the Ten PM segment of Scarborough Country, MSNBC squawking head Mesucmi (sp?) spoke about Al Queda's latest "militant" tape delivered to Pakistan, where we urged all good Pakistan muslims to rise up and kill the traitor and Pakistani leader Musharraf. (Musharraf, the running dog lackey of George "Jew-boy" Bush must die not only for attacking our militant membership on the Pakistan and Afghan border, but because we militants must have Pakistan's nuclear weapons!
Thank the moon-God it was such a relief to hear during MSNBC's broadcast, that another respected news organization like MSNBC still describes us as "militants"; this helps our recruitment when MSNBC acknowledges our struggles as legitimate militancy, including our wonderful attack on 9/11!
We and Reuters have been saying for years: we are NOT terrorists! We are militants! Our attacks on America on 9/11 where we sacrificed 3000 neo-cons to our moon-god was NOT terrorism! It was militancy!
Thank you again MSNBC, especially your editors and senior executives who are helping us gain more and more sympathy every day for our actions. More sympathy, of course, translates to more members and more "militant" action!
We also want to give a shout-out to the brave advertising buyers who continue to purchase ad time on MSNBC, even after many noisy Americans have vowed to boycott ads on media that subtly support and encourage us. You can be sure we know who each of you are, and when we finally get Sharia / Islamic law respected in Europe (THANK YOU SPAIN!), and eventually in America, we will be gentle and merciful with your children.
Except those of you who are Jewish: unless you convert to Islam, you will all get the Daniel Pearl necklace.
I remain, in sincere militancy, (NOT TERRORISM!)
Osama bin Shiite head
PS you can thank MSNBC for their support of Al Queda by writing to them here.
Friday, March 19, 2004
John Freakin' Kerry sings Plastic
[with apologies to Ernie Marrs, et al.]
"I don't care it don't sound like hip-hop,
s'long as I get the chance to flip-flop...
...Give my wife a ride in Kennedy's car...
Through all trials and tribulations,
we will screw up this great nation
Teddy, please take my wife in your car...